Dear Eddie:
I'm not much for writing these, as a matter of fact, I haven't written one in 7 months. But after viewing "Meet Dave" for over an excruciating and mind boggling hour, I felt it was that time again. I haven't really been a fan of your film or personal life for a very, very long time, but watching this movie made even me feel sorry and sad for you.
While relaying my Meet Dave watching experience and the fact that this film did 5 million in it's opening weekend, a friend of mine suggested that maybe director Brian Robbins has pictures of you and Johnny Gill in a very compromising position. This theory does seem to make a lot of sense; first he directs you in your post Oscar embarrassment "Norbit", then this current insane debacle, and next up the sigh inducing "Thousand Words" in which you are only allowed to say 1,000 words before you die. Which also seems to be the definitive death knell in your career as well.
I've been around Brian Robbins while working at the studio That Will Henceforth Remain Unnamed (TWHRU). He is a very charming guy, granted, but certainly not worth losing the respect of the general public. If he has pictures of you and Johnny, come clean--I promise you'll feel so much better once the heat wears off. If not, please consider 2 things:
A) Getting a restraining order against Brian Robbins
B) Putting this acting thing down for good, and producing some films that will make us care about you again.
I say this with love,
Invisible Woman
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